Many people get the connection between self-esteem and weight loss wrong. They think that people have to first lose weight for them to feel good about themselves or accept themselves. The reverse is actually correct: to lose weight effectively and, most importantly, keep those unwanted extra pounds off, you need a decent level of self-acceptance to begin with.
The good news is you can work on your self-acceptance without having to wait until you ‘look good enough to feel good.’ If you put yourself in the position of having to wait so you can ‘get permission’ to try and lose weight, you might be waiting a long time. In fact, you might be waiting forever. Keep the following sequence of personal realizations in mind so you can lose weight by first accepting yourself.
Accept Yourself For Greater Confidence
If you want to lose weight, you have to first accept yourself so you can gain confidence. You have to look at the way you look as ‘part of your overall package.’ Instead of wishing you could be or look like someone else, accept the way you look. Don’t put yourself down by telling yourself that you’ll only accept yourself if you look ‘better.’ Accept the way you look now. This doesn’t mean you want to look a certain way forever, or you don’t want to change. Instead, all this means is that you’re comfortable with yourself.
Greater Confidence Leads To Positive Action
Once you are comfortable with how you look, you give yourself permission to be more confident. When you build confidence in yourself, this increases your ability to take more positive actions. When you’re confident, you’re more likely to take action or try out new things. There’s a certain daring and sense of possibility you get when you feel confident.
“Fake It Till You Make It”
There’s even research out there that says that “faking it” works, if you can’t always summon up true self confidence. So if you can’t always feel confident, “act as if” you are confident, anyhow. A confident demeanor will help your self-acceptance, which will help your confidence… and before you know it you really will feel more self-assured.
By the way, that confident presentation you’ll be practicing is proven to help both your career and your dating life – more benefits from practicing self-confidence that extend beyond your weight and health.
Greater Self-Confidence Leads To Greater Feeling Of Choice
By focusing on the fact that your greater self-confidence gives you the opportunity and willingness to try new things or take action, you get a greater feeling of choice. You feel that you’re not trapped by circumstances. You don’t feel stuck. This is a very empowering feeling. You feel more in control. This enables you to pick a goal and be more likely to stick with it.
Greater Choice Leads To Better Results
Your weight is influenced by your emotional state. With confidence, by changing self-perception and being comfortable ‘in your own skin,’ you can choose what you want to look like instead of feeling pushed or pressured to lose weight. Best of all, you feel in control about your weight options, instead of feeling you have to look a certain way so you can feel good about yourself.
This is very liberating because one of the causes of weight loss failure is trying to lose weight to please others. When our feelings of validation are in the hands of other people, we feel less in control. We are doing things to please them, instead of doing things which are outgrowths of our own personal confidence. Focus on what’s inside you first, and everything else will follow.